Random Thursday: Trying not to teach

[hrj]

My department has been participating in a little "internal audit" this week. It might sound scary, but it's really a combination of a sort of friendly "readiness assessment" to identify issues we might want to address or prepare for in respect of upcoming external inspection visits, and also to provide an opportunity for practicing interacting with auditors for people like me.

Now, I have a peculiar problem when it comes to interacting with auditors, because the appropriate behavior is supposed to be something resembling a trial witness facing hostile cross-examination. Answer only the questions asked, be clear and concise and avoid volunteering information, especially if it might inspire further questions.

Clear, I can manage. Concise...not so easy. Avoid volunteering information? Might as well ask me to hold my breath until I turn blue. When someone asks me about an investigation, my impulse is to begin, "Well, it's complicated...let me give you some background."

I love to teach. I love to explain. I love to talk about how complex and inter-related everything is. I love nuance and ambiguity. None of these things are appropriate when talking to an auditor. So I practice with the internal reviewers and watch my boss wince at the other end of the table every time I offer one more word than the prescribed answers.

Comments

[hudebnik.livejournal.com]

That does sound difficult.

I'm reminded of when I was a postdoc, writing hundreds of job applications and tuning my academic C.V. My mentor kept telling me to trim things down: for every word, every fact, if you can't imagine someone hiring you with that fact who wouldn't have hired you without it, leave it out.

[kareina.livejournal.com]

oohh, now why didn't anyone ever give me such useful, clear advice? That might have been what I needed to break myself of volunteering too much information...

[pixel39.livejournal.com]

I have the same problem with the concise. I've been doing technical support since 1993, so the urge to explain things to the auditors is strong.

[hrj.livejournal.com]

Yes, it's just so counter to everything I'm normally *supposed* to be doing.

[beanolc.livejournal.com]

Oh I can definitely relate to this. There's a great scene in the movie Moneyball where one of the leads is negotiating to hire someone. In the middle of the conversation the lead hangs up. Stunned bystander says "why'd you hang up? He was still talking!" Lead says "He said yes." That was my old boss's favorite way to explain to his eager PMs that once you give the answer that's requested, shut up. Everything else is superfluous at best.

I'm not sure this is a bad thing

[capplor.livejournal.com]

We had one of those once in the Air Force. Everyone was well drilled not to volunteer information, but the one captain did so anyway. He knew what he was talking about, and described how we were, in fact, following the specified procedures, but he knew that there were areas where the procedures could be improved. He volunteered a ton of information, and got a commondation for it.

Breaking the rules like that can be good, if you're squeeky clean and know your stuff thoroughly. (The boss will still wince while you're doing it.)